why cant i find happiness....

sometimes i dream about a place where there isnt any drama, or fighting or relationships, i just dream about me being happy, but then i wake up from that dream, it sucks to know that the only happiness i can have is in a dream, although, i have had happiness once in my life, when my parents were together, i mean life was amazing, i remember going camping about having dad mom and all the kids together, i miss is, honestly i think that they both miss it as well. I'm stuck watching romance movies or reading them in the books just to get a glimpse of what i could have, :) you know the movies were it takes them a long time (end of the movie) to find out that their love was right under their nose, well i guess they make movies fake for a reason, because there is no such thing as true love or happiness, its only all in our heads, well i think this post is done, i will chat later, going to eat chocolate and eat ice cream and watch corny love stories, bye:)